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Life

Thank You For Breaking Me, Because Now I Am Complete

By May 29, 2017 September 28th, 2018 No Comments

You hurt me. You broke my heart. You damaged my emotions to the point of severe trauma. And for that, I am extremely thankful.

I just want to take this opportunity to say thanks. You are the reason that I am who I am today, and you shouldn’t belittle the role that you’ve played in my life. You hurt me. You broke my heart. You damaged my emotions to the point of severe trauma. And for that, I am extremely thankful. I remain forever indebted to you because of that experience.

You know that you belittled me and you demeaned me every chance you had. You brought me down just when I was about to climb to the pinnacle of my life. You used words to hurt and bruise my heart. You almost managed to make me believe in my own helplessness. You always managed to make me learn my own worthlessness. You always took shots at my heart and you hit the target every single time. You area master at the pain. You are the master of heartache. You always knew just when to ignore me; whenever I needed you the most. You always knew just when to act like you didn’t care; whenever I was at my most vulnerable. You always knew how to make me feel like I was worthless; whenever you say that I was at my saddest. And these weren’t isolated instances. You were always consistent. You kept things up for the entirety of the relationship. You never dropped the ball. You always knew how to bring about a waterfall of tears. It’s as if you knew about a secret button that you could press to just make me start crying. I was a puppet and you were a master puppeteer. Somehow, you had this uncanny ability to make me feel so alone even when I was surrounded by a million people.

And again, for all of those things, I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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For all of your ill intentions, you still managed to bring some very valuable perspective into my life. You still manage to impart very important life lessons unto me. You made me understand the real power of words; you made me realize the real weight of a person’s actions. You finally made me understand that pain only demands to be felt by the people who actually let it in. You made me understand that it is I who has the power over my emotions; not anyone else. You were the one who couldn’t love me the way I needed to be loved, and so I had to learn how to love myself. I discovered that I am more than enough. I learned that I have to stop relying on you for affection. You gave me some very tough love, and by tough I mean pathetic. And maybe that’s what I needed. Thank you for being that villain. Thank you for playing that role in my life.

You made me lots of promises and you fulfilled very little. You led me on for so long but you rarely ever delivered. In the end, I was left feeling hopeless and disappointed, but I guess that was my own fault. You always gave me a glimmer of hope, but then you never came through. You were nice to me one minute and you were despicable the next. You told me that you would always be there for me, but in the end, you never were. You said so many things, but your actions never backed your words up. You always let me down and I want you to know that I am grateful for that. You taught me that I should never expect much from people. You taught me that I am entitled to nothing and that I have to work for what I want. You taught me to be independent and to operate on my own time. You taught me to never let my happiness rely on the word of another person. You taught me that I should be the source of my own happiness. You taught me that only I could meet all of my expectations. You taught me that other people always had the power to betray me, but I am the only one who could never betray myself.

Lastly, I want to thank you for leaving a huge void in my life. I want to thank you for allowing me the opportunity to actually find someone who will treat me the way that I deserve to be treated. I want to thank you for giving me a contrast in life; for teaching me about the kinds of people I should be avoiding for as long as I live. Thank you for teaching me about what love shouldn’t be. Thank you for making me realize just how much I’m worth. Thank you for helping me understand that I deserve more than you could ever give. 

Thank you for allowing me to find love elsewhere. 

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