The right person is out there, even if you haven’t found them as of yet.
Love isn’t what it used to be anymore. Primarily since it’s just treated as a word without meaning. People throw it around wherever they go. It’s almost sad how you just tell a person that you’re in love with them to get them to do something for you or to get you to stop talking.
You’re in a fight with your partner and they just bluntly blurt out that they love you so that you’ll stop talking about everything that’s wrong in the relationship, then that isn’t genuine. Love used to be this sacred feeling which you only felt towards certain people in your family, certain friends and only one special person.
There are many reasons why you can’t find love – the right kind, anymore. Some of them are given below:
You feel like what you got is the best you’ll ever get.
As sad as it may be, people often reduce themselves to whatever they think is the closest to what they can achieve. People often forget that they’re strong and independent people who require someone to raise them up and not throw them down.
There are days when your relationship is soaring and days when it’s crashing, however, you’re able to tell that this won’t be forever. Just because you two fought once, doesn’t mean that you two have to spend months not talking to one another. Just because of one small fight, you don’t have to feel like the relationship is as good as finished.
Love is a feeling which, when genuine, is perfection. You don’t have to settle for second best just because that’s all you’ve ever gotten. Truth be told, the right guy is out there no matter what you might have convinced yourself of.
You think that you can change your partner
I’m pretty sure everyone knows that you can’t completely change a person. They have a specific personality which, as much as you want them to let go of, they can’t stop being what they are. However, you can’t comprehend that.
Just because of a few heartwarming moments, you feel like they’re the one and no matter how much they force you into thinking otherwise, you can’t believe that just because of those few heartwarming moments. Thinking that they’ll always be that way is wrong.
A reserved person might show you some love once in a while, verbally, however, they can never stop showing it to you some other way. That’s their personality, you can’t change that at all. If someone generally loves you then they’ll make sure that you realise that.
However, holding onto a thin thread for your entire relationship will only disappoint you later.
You’re told that they’re the best you’ll ever get
Here’s another thing, sometimes you’re the type of person who has low self-esteem or low self-confidence. This is something which is highlighted in a relationship when your partner is mentally abusive.
I honestly think that mental abuse is often overlooked since people associate abuse with physical harm and think that if they can’t see it, it didn’t happen. Love is nothing if you feel like your self-esteem is constantly diminishing every second you’re with your partner.
However, in a mentally abusive relationship, you’re reduced to such an extent that you think you can never get anything better. This is all you’ll ever get.
You need to understand that you’re your own person who can’t be defined by what someone else thinks of you or forces you to think of yourself.
You’ve been with them for so long that, in your mind, this is it
Sometimes, people spend so many years with one person that they’re led to believe that this is it. They think that they’ll spend their entire lives with that person. What they often overlook, just out of fear that they’ll have to change their entire outlook on the future, the way in which their relationship is destroying them.
You enter a relationship since you develop romantic feelings towards to a person. With time, you rather show how you still have those feelings even though you feel like they’ve lost all of them. You think that it’ll be over soon and they’ll turn back into the person you thought that they were. This is probably your biggest mistake.
I’ve mentioned holding onto a thin thread and in this case, that expression is also validated. You’re holding onto hope that they’ll turn back. This goes on for years and years until one day you think that this is it, this is the person. Merely since you’ve spent years. You overlook the fact that over the course of these years all that’s ever happened is you holding onto hope that they’ll change. Years were spent crying and feeling dejected.
Here’s the thing: The right person is out there, even if you haven’t found them as of yet. There’s someone for everyone but sometimes (as explained in these cases) love is reduced to something which isn’t even second to best, it’s the worst! What you need is the best love there is. Look at yourself in the mirror, tell yourself what you want. Disney might have given us unrealistic expectations but if you want prince charming to go through every means necessary to find you, then that’s what you should expect love to be.
Love isn’t what it used to be because we don’t believe in what it really is anymore – perfection.
