What Not To Do In An Argument With Your Partner, Because Fighting Fair Is Where It’s At
"No name-calling, under any circumstances."
Getting into unnecessary fights with your boyfriend or girlfriend is always discouraged. However, there is no denying that fights are inevitable in any relationship and that even the best kinds of couples have occasional arguments. The trick is in ensuring that any arguments or fights you have together are ones that are healthy and not damaging to the relationship. Essentially, the outcome and value of an argument is dependent on the people who are having it. Simple feuds and fights have the potential to unravel into very heated, emotional, and deep battles. That’s why it is always important to maintain a level head whenever you are currently in a fight with your partner.
Always remember that all couples will fight at some point. Whether frequently or rarely, the fights will come; and it’s how couples react to these fights that determine whether a relationship is going to last or not. Here are some simple tips that you could take note of whenever you are caught in a heated argument with your boyfriend or girlfriend:
1. Keep things clean and classy.
Always make sure to never go overboard in your arguments. Keep things classy and disagree with civility. There is absolutely no need for volatile and disruptive attitudes when you are caught in a heated fight. If you want your relationship to survive, you have to maintain your manners and keep a level head at all moments. In other words, no cheap shorts and dirty tricks.
2. No name-calling under any circumstances.
In connection with the previous item, calling each other names is a big no-no. Remember that any word you utter in these times of turmoil can and will be used against you in the future should your relationship manage to survive this ordeal. Don’t result to stupid grade-school teasing and name-calling. It’s beneath you. If you are both mature enough to be in a relationship, then you are mature enough to not have childish fights.
3. Don’t bring up any other points of argument.
Don’t you dare bring up that time she forgot to turn the stove off. This is not the appropriate moment to remind him of when he scratched the brand new car while parking. Now is not the time to bring up past arguments. Keep those arguments in their place in time and just move on. Try your very hardest to focus on whatever problems you are encountering in the present.– Continue reading on the next page
4. Keep things contained within the context of your central argument.
In connection with the previous item on this list, just try to avoid straying away from any unrelated topics in general. If you are having a fight about finances, there’s no need to drag your girlfriend’s sister with the crappy attitude into it. Keep your arguments contained within the context of what you were originally fighting about.
5. Express your feelings in a calm and sensitive manner.
Don’t get into shouting matches with each other, and never ever resort to physical abuse. Use your words calmly and logically. Be sure to always express how you’re feeling and don’t sweep it under the rug. Leave it all out in the open so that the both of you can address it as adults. However, when you are expressing yourself, feel free to do so with utmost patience and sensitivity. Remember that words can be damaging and hurtful.
6. As difficult as it is, don’t take anything personally.
Remember to never attack each other on a personal level. You will end up saying things that you will regret. Getting personal when you’re arguing with each other can result in very deep emotional wounds that may never get the chance to heal. Always be wary of your words, and try to be empathetic with the feelings of your partner.
7. Be respectful.
Respect is the foundation for any relationship, whether romantic, friendly, or professional. Respect is what allows us to coexist with each other in a systematic, orderly, and humane manner. Once we are disrespectful in our words and our actions, then there will indeed be hell to pay. No one can have a proper civil argument when respect gets tossed out of the window.– Continue reading on the next page
8. Keep calm and don’t go off the rails.
Don’t go to crazy town just because you’re getting emotional. Remember to stay in the moment and remember that this hardship will pass if you maintain your sanity. Be mature about it and try your best to understand where your partner is coming from. Don’t start acting up in crazy ways like Sid and Nancy.
9. Keep emotional baggage in check.
Whatever emotional baggage you may have had going into the argument, keep it in check. There’s no value in bringing them into the argument as they are. You might only be making things worse by doing so.
10. Don’t be a prick.
Lastly, just stop being a prick. Don’t be a pain in a bit. Be a smart, intelligent, and patient human being who understands that fights happen and that they don’t necessarily mean the end of the world.
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How do you guys resolve fights? Let me know in the comments below!