Sex is a plus, NOT a priority.
Sex is great. It’s one of the many perks of being in a loving and sensual relationship with someone. In fact, there are a lot of people who get motivated to get into relationships with one another because of their sexual chemistry. And while that’s perfectly okay, sex should never be the main reason that two people continue to stay together in a relationship. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to express your intimacy and affection for your partner in a healthy manner, but it shouldn’t be the main foundation on which a relationship is built. Priorities are always important in a relationship, and if you don’t get your priorities straight, you risk messing up the relationship as a whole
Sex isn’t the equivalent of love and you have to be mature enough to know that by now. You have to be smart enough to know that just because you are sexually intimate with a person doesn’t mean that your feelings of lust are automatically going to translate into love. It doesn’t work like that. Sex is fun, and it’s a great way to manifest your love. But it isn’t necessarily the same as love. Having an active sex life doesn’t necessarily equate to having a loving, meaningful, and fulfilling relationship.
As special as it might be to have sex with someone, it’s not going to be as special as genuinely falling in love with someone. Sleeping with someone is a very simple and easy task when compared to actually having to maintain a relationship with a person. Sex makes up only one aspect of the relationship, and when a couple fails to neglect the other more important parts of it, then the relationship is sure to fail.
As human beings, it’s embedded into your primal instincts for you to want to have sex with one another. But that isn’t all that you need from each other. Sex only somewhat covers the physical and emotional needs of a relationship. There are greater depths to being in love with someone that transcend just having sex with one another. Sex isn’t going to be able to put a roof above your heads. Sex isn’t going to put food on the table. Sex isn’t going to push either of you further in your careers. Sex isn’t going to further enrich your sense of humor. Sex isn’t going to manage your finances. Sex isn’t going to always be amazing.
Remember that it is more likely to find people who have sex with one another than it is to find a couple caught in a genuine love. The reason for that is because love is always going to be special a lot more special than mere sex. Only those who are emotionally mature and strong will be able to maintain a loving relationship. The weakest are those who believe that sex is the end to everything in a relationship.
Intimacy is important in sustaining a relationship. And sex is a form of intimacy. But it’s not the only form of intimacy. Intimacy can take its shape in various forms. It doesn’t always have to be about sex. You don’t have to be taking your clothes off just for you to be intimate with one another. And the strongest kinds of relationships already understand this. In fact, the best and strongest kind of intimacy doesn’t come from sex. It comes from genuine openness, trust, respect, and vulnerability in one another.
You can’t afford to let yourself become the couple that is just absolutely obsessed with sex to the point that you completely disregard all other aspects of the relationship. You will never really allow your love to have the chance or the space that it needs to establish itself and prosper if all you can think about is sex.
And one of the trickiest things about sex is that it can be fun with just about anyone. Your partner can be expendable in this situation. With physical pleasures, you can seek it from just about anyone. So if you’re building your relationship on sex, then what’s stopping you from having sex with multiple partners? Love, however, is much more exclusive than sex. You can’t just find love and fulfillment from just anyone that you’re going to meet. Love is something that you establish and build with a single person alone. It’s not something that’s transferrable or easily found anywhere else.
At the end of the day, sex in a relationship is going to be great. It’s a healthy manifestation of love and affection. But it doesn’t have to be everything. In fact, it can’t be everything. The bottom line is not to find a partner that you can have sex with and you can just love on the side. The point is to find someone who you can love deeply with sex as a plus.
Do you agree?
Talk to me in the comments below!