We’re told to believe that in order to be happy, we need a partner. No one can grasp the idea that some people prefer to stay single. There are many people who’re in relationships and we’re quick to categorise them as some of the happiest people in the world, in contrast, we categorise single people as sad individuals who haven’t found love yet. The truth is, even if they do find someone worthy of being their ‘soulmate’, these individuals would rather stay the way they already are than to begin a relationship. Why?
1. Being in a relationship doesn’t make anyone happier than not being in one and vice versa.
Everyone has their own outlook on life. Some people believe that finding true love is the purpose of our lives, whereas some people believe that it is not. Rather, they believe that happiness shouldn’t be limited to another person being in their lives. To call single people ‘lonely’ would be unfair because being single i.e. not in a relationship, doesn’t mean that they don’t have friends. It doesn’t mean that they’re socially awkward, it means that they just don’t see the point when others say that love is necessary.
Maybe their love isn’t in one person, it might be with their family, friends or even pets. Whatever it might be, being single doesn’t make you any sadder than someone in a relationship and being in a relationship doesn’t mean that they’re any happier than someone who’s single.
2. They don’t want to go through all the work.
It’s a matter of choice whether someone accepts the work there is to a relationship or whether they choose not to. It doesn’t necessarily have to make a person shallow. It’s their choice. Some people will disregard the happiness that is possible in a relationship and focus on the cons instead.
When a relationship ends in either a break up or a divorce, there is undoubtedly grief and anger and these people have seen enough of that to conclude that being in a relationship will ultimately lead to regret.
3. They have other things to focus on.
They choose to focus on their own future rather than a joint future with someone else. Labeling these people as self-centered is like thinking it is wrong to care about yourself first. It’s what they want, it’s what they choose to focus on. The whole process of a relationship seems tiresome to them and they’d rather not even be in a relationship if all they want to do is focus on other things.
4. They’ve seen what we focus on.
Admit it, we choose to focus on what will get the most reaction. Television shows tell us about all the scams and all the cheating there is to a relationship rather than looking at all the good things. It’s only natural for people to think that those are the only things that go on in a relationship if they’ve never been in one or if they have been in one and that’s all that they’ve faced.
5. They find commitment overrated.
Here’s the thing, odds are that these people have been in relationships before but because of how they ended, they realised that they don’t need to stay committed to someone. If they want to be with someone for a night, that doesn’t count as an actual relationship and they’re technically still living the single life. It’s being with someone without the commitment involved.
6. They’ve had a past.
Some people have had a past where all they’ve seen is people getting into relationships and then getting out of them. The relationship seems to never last. Maybe they’ve even heard people confide in them of their cheating. All of this is bound to have an effect on you. Think of it yourself, if you’ve grown up being surrounded by failed or cheated relationships, how would you react?
7. Sometimes, it’s even religious.
As weird as it might to sound to a lot of people, the choice of being single is something that they feel religiously compelled to. It might seem weird or even absurd to us but for them it’s a decision.
At the end of the day, whether you’re single or in a relationship, it’s a choice and external factors don’t have to affect this choice.
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Are you happy being single or in a relationship? What’s your take on people who haven’t been in relationships yet? Let me know in the comments below!