You Can’t Blame Her For Getting Over You

 You don’t have the right to hate her for moving on from your failed relationship experiment. 

You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting and eventually succeeding to get over you. None of it was her fault and you know it. You are the one who forced her hand. And so it’s you, of all people, who is not allowed to blame her for wanting to get on with her life a life that no longer includes you.

You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to fight for a better future for herself. She was so tired of all of the insecurity that she felt when she was still with you. She never felt like she knew what place she held in your life. She could never know for sure just how much she meant to you. You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to seek that security elsewhere. She has her own life to worry about. And you never really cared to give a damn about it anyway so why do you care now? You can’t blame her for wanting to find someone who will give her the kind of security that you could never give her. She wants to find someone who will hold her hand as she walks the pathway of life because in the past, you always chose to walk at your own pace. You were always walking ahead of her or lagging behind. You never asked her how fast or slow she wanted to go. You can’t blame her for wanting to be with someone who wants to face life side-by-side with her. You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to be with a person who makes her work too hard for such little love. You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to pursue a love that doesn’t belittle her or make her feel like she’s less of a person than she really is.

You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to get over you because in that process, she is also choosing to prioritize her own well-being; the way that you always used to prioritize your own self.

You don’t have the right to blame her for wanting to find happiness. Because that is all any of us ever want in this life anyway. All we could ever want for ourselves is to be happy. And it’s precisely because she couldn’t be happy with you that she’s deciding to get over you instead. And you really can’t blame her for the fact that she wasn’t happy with you. That was your fault. That one is on you. You can’t blame her for wanting to find someone who makes her feel beautiful; because you managed to make her feel ugly and undervalued every day that you were together. You can’t blame her for thinking that she deserved to be treated better; that she deserved to be loved. You can’t blame her for wanting to try her hand at experiencing real love with someone else.

You can’t blame her for wanting to get over the man who gave her a broken heart. You can’t blame her for wanting to take the time to just recover and fix all the wounds that you inflicted on her. You can’t blame her for wanting to recuperate her soul and reawaken her spirit. She couldn’t do any of those things without first moving on and getting over you. You can’t blame her for wanting to find a man who has no problem being everything that you could never be for her. You can’t blame her for wanting to feel loved, appreciated, respected, cherished, valued, adored, and revered. You can’t blame her for wanting to feel all of the things that she should have felt with you in the first place. She wants to be with someone who gives her strengths a chance to shine; not someone who only focuses on her flaws and insecurities. She wants to be with someone who doesn’t make her feel like a burden or a problem. She wants to be with someone who feels like it would be a privilege and a pleasure to be in a relationship with her. And you can’t blame her for wanting those things after the kind of treatment that you gave her.

You can’t blame her for actually choosing to give up on whatever it is you had together. You can’t blame her for not wanting to wait around for you forever. You can’t blame her for wanting to pursue better things. You can’t blame her after failing to deliver despite all of the chances that she gave you.

You can’t blame her for wanting to feel loved. Because deep inside, you know that everything is all your fault. And if you’re looking for someone to blame, you need to only look in a mirror.

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