They need you, they’re suffering, please don’t push them away.
Addiction is adisease. For many people, it can be the main culprit in propagating a terriblelife. Addiction is a dark and terrible place where troubled people go to escapefrom the harshness of reality. A lot of people carry with themselves demonsthat live inside of them. These are demons that have the power to continuouslyeat away at their insides. They force their hosts to self-destruct and it’sbeyond the victim’s control. The only way to really destroy these demons iswith light; and that light is love.
Love can’t solveeverything in the world, but it sure does have the power to help people who aresuffering with addiction. Love is a powerful agent in defeating the innerdemons of the world. Love is able to put blinding light in the darkness ofhuman lives. That is why when you happen to be in love with someone who issuffering from an addiction, you have to understand that your love is the onlyway you can get out of this mess. You also have to be patient and kind. Youhave to know that your partner who is suffering from addiction won’tnecessarily have the same mindset as you. You have to be more empathetic andunderstanding. You will have to stretch the limits of your patience to thepoint where you will have to bear lots of pain on behalf of the both of you.Here are a few things to keep in mind when the person you love is an addict.
1. Addiction can change a person.
Addiction is anillness so severe that it has the power to complete alter a person’spersonality and character. It may be common for people who are battling withsevere cases of addition to be completely different from who they werepreviously. Know that the person you love is still inside there somewhere beingsuppressed by the addiction.
2. Addicts need to be told no.
They will havetheir cravings. They will be resilient. They will be persistent. They will trytheir best to reach for their sources of satisfaction, but you will need todeny them that reach. You will need to tell them that they can do without theseunnatural substances.
3. You will need to balance optimism and realism.
You want tobring in lots of light and love into an addict’s life and that’s why you alwayswant to maintain a certain sense of optimism and positivity. However, thatdoesn’t mean that you should be turning a blind eye to reality. The life of anaddict can get very dark and heavy and it’s only after understanding thedarkness wherein you can actually start bringing the light in.
4. Do not believe that their disease has defeated them.
Addiction isalways going to be difficult to overcome, but it never wins unless you let it.You and your partner must always maintain an attitude that refuses to give in.You cannot just accept defeat and let the addiction run its course. You are theones who always get the final say.
5. Stand your ground.
You will want togive in sometimes. You will pity your addict partner and you might want to justthrow in the towel. But you can’t. For the sake of the both of you, you need tostand your ground and stay strong. You can’t afford to give in just yet.
6. Set boundaries in the relationship.
Boundaries arenormal in any relationship, but they are of particular importance in arelationship with an addict. The reason these boundaries are important is thatthey teach an addict that they aren’t entitled to doing just whatever they wantto do in life. But you also have to make sure that these boundaries arenurturing and loving in nature.
7. Be a helper, not an enabler.
There is a starkdifference between being a helper and enabler. You want to be supportive ofyour partner who is suffering from addiction. But you don’t want to supportyour partner in a way that actually supports the addiction. You want to helpthem out of the disease. You don’t want to propagate it further.
8. There’s no point in playing the blame-game.
You will want tofind someone to blame. You might blame your partner. You might blame yourself.But you should know that playing the blame-game gets you nowhere and it helpsabsolutely no one.
9. Don’t forget to take care of yourself.
As you aretaking care of your partner who is battling with addiction, you might end upneglecting yourself in the process. Remember that you can’t possibly take careof another person unless you take care of yourself first. Make sure that yourphysical, mental, and emotional well-being are stable before you devoteyourself to helping your partner.
10. Don’t be afraid to let them know that you love them.
Love is the key.Let your partner know that love will always be there; that love has the powerto drive away that darkness; and that love should be worth enough to go onliving a wonderful life for.
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Have you been with someone with an addiction? How did you deal with it? Let me know in the comments below!