I cannot emphasize how much we wish men knew these things, even the best of men fail to understand some of our basic needs. These things are no big deal but life would be so much better if men knew them.
1. Hear us out
We understand that you guys have though jobs and it’s hard to be all charged up when you get home after a tiring day. The thing is we have been working all day long too and we love you and there is no one in the world we would rather talk too. Us, women, need to vent out so please, listen to what we have to say. It would mean so much to us. You have to know that communication is always going to be the most important aspect of any relationship. When you listen to us and make us feel heard, it’s such a great feeling in the world. There are very few things that are more comforting than knowing that we have someone in our lives who would be willing to really listen to us and pay attention to our needs. At the end of the day, isn’t that what a relationship is supposed to be about? Isn’t it about having someone who has your back at all times? I need to know that you’re always going to have my back. I have to know that you’re always going to be willing to lend me an ear for whenever I need to get something off my chest. You shouldn’t underestimate just how much I need someone who would be willing to pay attention to me. You can always choose to disagree, but at least make it a point to hear me out first. Don’t make me feel afraid or hesitant to talk to you about anything at all. You wouldn’t want it to get to a point wherein I just stop talking to you altogether.
2. Don’t pretend to listen
Don’t just pretend to listen to what we have to say. We talk to you because we trust you and sometimes we just need moral and emotional support. It’s very disappointing when we are fretting about something and you have nothing to say except, huh’ indulge in the conversation it makes us feel loved and special. Sure, it’s a great gesture that you make me feel like you’re listening to me, but I really need you to hear me out. Again. Don’t take me for granted. Whenever we say something to you, know that it’s important. No matter how simple or insignificant it might seem to you, it’s really important that you pay attention to it. It hurts so much to know that we’re wasting our saliva and pouring our hearts out to someone who is essentially just letting everything get into one ear and out through the next. Of course, listening to what we have to say is only half of what we expect you to do. We also expect you to engage with us. You don’t have to give us any insightful responses or witty remarks. We don’t expect you to always come up with words of wisdom. However, at the very least, respond to us. Engage with us. Make us feel like we’re not merely just talking to a wall. Let us feel like you’re truly invested in what we have to say. Help us understand what you’re not just posturing or patronizing us. When I talk to you, I need you to talk to me back too.
3. Pamper us when we are sick
Please make us feel cared for when we are sick. We know that you are very concerned when you say, take your medicines and go to sleep, I’ll handle everything else’ but that’s just not enough, we need your attention. Treat us like a little baby when we’re not well. Of course, whenever we are functioning at optimal health, you can always count on us to be there for you and provide for your every need. We are always going to try our best to cater to your desires. After all, we love you and we want to do everything possible to make your life as comfortable and as happy as can be. However, we are only human and we get sick and tired sometimes too. While our hearts might be powerful and full of love, we aren’t always going to have the physical strength to function properly in life. In these moments, we hope that you can be there for us. Even simple gestures like having our meds ready or cooking our meals for us can go a really long way in making us feel safe and cared for. When we’re at our lowest and most vulnerable, this is where you have to shine your brightest. In marriage, they always talk about the idea of loving someone in sickness and in health. This is why I always need to feel your love whenever I’m sick or down with some kind of illness.