I cannot emphasize how much we wish men knew these things, even the best of men fail to understand some of our basic needs. These things are no big deal but life would be so much better if men knew them.
1. Hear us out
We understand that you guys have though jobs and it’s hard to be all charged up when you get home after a tiring day. The thing is we have been working all day long too and we love you and there is no one in the world we would rather talk too. Us, women, need to vent out so please, listen to what we have to say. It would mean so much to us. You have to know that communication is always going to be the most important aspect of any relationship. When you listen to us and make us feel heard, it’s such a great feeling in the world. There are very few things that are more comforting than knowing that we have someone in our lives who would be willing to really listen to us and pay attention to our needs.
At the end of the day, isn’t that what a relationship is supposed to be about? Isn’t it about having someone who has your back at all times? I need to know that you’re always going to have my back. I have to know that you’re always going to be willing to lend me an ear for whenever I need to get something off my chest. You shouldn’t underestimate just how much I need someone who would be willing to pay attention to me. You can always choose to disagree, but at least make it a point to hear me out first. Don’t make me feel afraid or hesitant to talk to you about anything at all. You wouldn’t want it to get to a point wherein I just stop talking to you altogether.
2. Don’t pretend to listen
Don’t just pretend to listen to what we have to say. We talk to you because we trust you and sometimes we just need moral and emotional support. It’s very disappointing when we are fretting about something and you have nothing to say except, huh’ indulge in the conversation it makes us feel loved and special. Sure, it’s a great gesture that you make me feel like you’re listening to me, but I really need you to hear me out. Again. Don’t take me for granted. Whenever we say something to you, know that it’s important. No matter how simple or insignificant it might seem to you, it’s really important that you pay attention to it.
It hurts so much to know that we’re wasting our saliva and pouring our hearts out to someone who is essentially just letting everything get into one ear and out through the next. Of course, listening to what we have to say is only half of what we expect you to do. We also expect you to engage with us. You don’t have to give us any insightful responses or witty remarks. We don’t expect you to always come up with words of wisdom. However, at the very least, respond to us. Engage with us. Make us feel like we’re not merely just talking to a wall. Let us feel like you’re truly invested in what we have to say. Help us understand what you’re not just posturing or patronizing us. When I talk to you, I need you to talk to me back too.
3. Pamper us when we are sick
Please make us feel cared for when we are sick. We know that you are very concerned when you say, take your medicines and go to sleep, I’ll handle everything else’ but that’s just not enough, we need your attention. Treat us like a little baby when we’re not well. Of course, whenever we are functioning at optimal health, you can always count on us to be there for you and provide for your every need. We are always going to try our best to cater to your desires. After all, we love you and we want to do everything possible to make your life as comfortable and as happy as can be. However, we are only human and we get sick and tired sometimes too.
While our hearts might be powerful and full of love, we aren’t always going to have the physical strength to function properly in life. In these moments, we hope that you can be there for us. Even simple gestures like having our meds ready or cooking our meals for us can go a really long way in making us feel safe and cared for. When we’re at our lowest and most vulnerable, this is where you have to shine your brightest. In marriage, they always talk about the idea of loving someone in sickness and in health. This is why I always need to feel your love whenever I’m sick or down with some kind of illness.
4. Help out in the house
Yes, we know you have a job but we get tired of going through the same routine over and over again. Help us out around the house once a week; on weekends we really need a break! As the cliché goes, it takes two to tango. I’m not the only one in this relationship. I’m not the only one here who is trying to make it work. If that were the case, then we wouldn’t get very far in our relationship. In fact, no relationship would ever be able to survive a one-sided effort.
It’s always going to have to be a team affair. You have to make sure that you are also doing your part in trying to help me out with things. Maintaining a home is no easy affair. There are many components to creating a happy and healthy life at home. A lot of it is some genuine hard work. Yes, I understand that you may get exhausted from the work that you do at your job. However, I also get tired of being the woman of the household. I also get tired from having to keep things afloat in this home. This is why I need you to step up and do your part as well. I need you to help me out with anything that is required in the home. There are a lot of things that you can do which I can’t.
5. Run errands
Help us run errands, don’t be selfish. Throw the trash out, pick up groceries, drop the children to school the list goes on. Just help us out a bit, trust me if you had to manage a job and a house you would appreciate us a whole lot more! Again, being in a partnership like this one means always having each other’s backs. I must always know that I can count on you to have my back for whenever I need you.
I need to know that I can rely on you to be there for me whenever I’m struggling to get things done. As much as possible, I’m going to run as many errands as I can to make sure that your life is a happy and comfortable one. However, I need to know that you would be willing to do the same for me. I need you to prove to me that I’m worth that same kind of effort. Even if you don’t want to do something, I still need to know that you would be willing to do it just because it would make my life easier and more convenient. I need to know that you would be selfless enough to put my own personal happiness and my needs above your own every once in a while. After all, when it comes to true love, selflessness is always going to be key. This is why I wish you would run errands for me every once in a while.