Everyone has dreamt of their perfect wedding, from the dress till the bouquet, many young girls have planned their fairytale wedding down to the T. The truth is that even if you have a wedding covered by the tabloids, it isn’t until after the marriage that everything starts to unravel. The dream ends right there, now it’s time to look at the reality of things. You have a husband, you have a partner, you call him your soulmate but who’s to say your Prince Charming isn’t actually Sergeant Douche? Here are some signs to differentiate one from the other:
1. Treating you like a puppet.
On a scale of “just casually asking where are you to demanding to know what you bought and why”, how controlling is your husband? There’s a fine line between what you can deem as “cute”, then it goes on to “acceptable”, crossing over to “creepy” and finally reaches to down right “psychopathic”. You are your own person and you might have vowed to stand by your husband through anything, but come on, you’re not his property to take control of.
2. Being critical.
There is no scale for this sign, if your husband thinks that it’s okay for him to criticise you about your looks, career or just criticise you in general, then he isn’t owning up to his vows. Let’s face it, perfection doesn’t exist. There isn’t a single person on Earth today that everyone can unanimously vote as the “world’s most perfect person”. Everyone has their preferences and your husband only got to be your ‘husband’ because he saw you as someone he would define perfection with. If your guy thinks that he gets to be a jerk to you and makes you feel down, then trust me, he’s not worth it.
3. Objectifying you.
Guys, you didn’t get your wife like you get a toy in a cereal box. She’s a human being who might be ‘yours’, so to speak, but you don’t own her. Taking it to the next step only happens if both of you are completely smitten over one another. No guy should look at you as his property and as just something to get fun from for a while and refuse to acknowledge themВ later.
4. Won’t spare a second for you.
You can’t constantly tell yourself that it’s okay that your husband had to cancel yet anotherВ date night because he was busy. He can be busy, sure, but the thing is that both of you are in a relationship now and that involves taking time out for one another. If you can’t be in each other’s presence all the time, it’s fine if you think so but you need to be there for each other at some parts of the day and always go to bed together looking forward to a new glorious marital day.
5. Has high expectations from you… ALL THE TIME.
Preferences are completely natural but to force someone to like a person whom they don’t think is right for them, is unjust. That being said, HE MARRIED YOU! It wasn’t just a spur of the moment decision. It obviously took time for either one of you to confront your feelings for each other. He can’t just expect you to live up to his expectations of what you should’ve been, that ship has sailed, my friend. A few changes here and there are fine if that’s what you think you need but he can’t compare you. Men, never compare your wife to anyone, NEVER.
6. Is a nightmare at the house.
People usually think that whoever brings home the income, gets to be automatically excused from working around the house. What if you bring all of it? Or even half of it? Whatever the situation may be, you two put in all that money towards your future together and that can’t happen unless he gets his feet off the table. Any building can be a house but not every house can be called a home. Both of you need to put in effort and help each other out around the house.
7. You have to tell yourself he ‘isn’t all that bad’, but you know he is.
Here’s the thing, you can be the King of France for what it’s worth, but you can’t be a loser. Ladies, if you know that his habits are revolting and if you have confronted him about them but he shrugs it off as something you’re ‘over reacting’ about, give him an ‘are you kidding me?’ look and kick him out. Your husband shouldn’t lose his temper all the time on every little thing or use language like he’s a teenage kid going through a phase.
You have to ask yourself this – is he worth it? Can you overlook all of the signs?