A man shared his sad story about not being able to share a bed with his wife at his in-law’s place because they didn’t allow him.
Recently a guy took to Reddit’s AITA platform and shared that his wife’s family refused to let him sleep in the same bed as her.
“My wife and I got married last summer. Her family lives across the country from us, so up until this point, I had never actually visited them, but I had met them a handful of times, and we’ve always gotten along fine,” he wrote.
“They invited us to come visit and stay with them for a few days and we took them up on the offer. We flew in yesterday, and everything went well – her dad and I watched football while she caught up with her mom and sisters, and then we had a really nice dinner.
After dinner, when they all stood up to go to their rooms and sleep the night off, his wife’s family asked him to sleep on a couch.
“But things went south at the end of the night when it was made clear that they didn’t want me sharing a bed with my wife while in their home, and that they expected me to sleep on the couch.”
The man initially thought they were joking with him, but it turned out that they were not.
“I honestly thought they were joking at first, but they insisted we sleep separately. I had a problem with the implication that I shouldn’t be allowed to sleep next to my wife, and I also have a bad back and the couch did not look the least bit comfortable (they don’t have a guest room).”
“After arguing back and forth for a bit, I decided to leave and book a hotel. I told my wife she didn’t have to come with me, she chose to stay, and I said I’d come back the next day. I went off to a Marriott about 10m away and got a good night’s sleep, trying to not let the whole situation bother me,” he said in his post.
The following day when he called his wife to ask if he should come over, she told him that her family wanted to apologize for their behavior.
“I told her that I’m willing to apologize to keep the peace, but they need to acknowledge that it wasn’t appropriate to insist I can’t share a bed with my own wife. She said she’d talk to them and call me back.”
He added, “About 10 minutes later, I hear back from her, and she tells me that not only will they not apologize for it, they are now insisting I need to come back and stay on the couch for the rest of our visit, and if I don’t agree to this, I’m not welcome back in the house. I’m pretty livid at this point – I told her that there’s absolutely no chance that I will do that, and I am no longer willing to offer any sort of apology.”
The annoyed husband said that his wife became really upset, and then her sisters started calling and teasing him that he should give up and sleep on the couch for the rest of his trip before the whole issue turned into a serious family feud.
“From my perspective, I don’t care what they think, and I’m willing to treat the rest of this trip as a solo vacation, go sightseeing, and meet my wife back at the airport at the end of the week. AITA?” he asked.
OP’s post received more than 23K upvotes on Reddit and nearly 4K comments.
Almost all comments sided with the OP and said he wasn’t the TA in this situation.
“NTA – Your in-laws are abhorrent hosts. It’s their house, their rules, and their rules are stupid. Rather than fighting a pointless battle, you set a clear and valid boundary, and they chose to take offense to it. They want you to stay on their couch because it’s a power play. You staying in a hotel takes that power away, and they can’t handle it. The fact that your wife doesn’t have your back on this is a giant red flag. Good luck,” one Redditor said.
“NTA, but I have serious doubts about your relationship.
And DO NOT HAVE CHILDREN with your wife until you figure out whose side she is on. Right now it is not yours. You should not come second to her family, especially in this situation,” a second wrote.
“NTA. You have a wife problem just as much as you have an in-law problem. She should be defending you, not deferring to them. Do not back down on this because they are blatantly disrespecting you and disrespecting your marriage. And if your wife can’t support you in this, I would suggest some marriage counseling when you get home because you’re her chosen family now. She needs to act like it,” a third commenter said.
The OP added an update to his original post and said he invited his wife and her sisters out for dinner and discussed the matter in detail. The main person who had issues with him sharing a bed with his wife was his father-in-law, who was aggressive and controlling.
After a detailed discussion, they all concluded that it was time for them to let their father know he was clearly the wrong person, not just in this situation but overall – since he always throws a fit when he doesn’t get his way.
So, they all mutually decided that OP would book a hotel by the beach an hour away from their home, and they would all stay there for the rest of the week without informing their father. This way, he will learn his lesson, and OP’s wife and sister will get to take a stand against him.
What are your thoughts on this man’s story? Let us know in the comment section.
Source: Reddit
