Imagine this scenario: you are starting to flirt with a guy who has really tickled your fancy so far. You’ve already gone out on your fair share of dates. You have had some brushes with each other in a very physically intimate manner. You flirt with one another a lot; and you really stare longingly into each other’s eyes. You find yourself always thinking of him; whether you’re about to go to sleep or when you’re just starting to wake up in the morning. You’ve already gotten a good sense of who he is because of all the time that you’ve been spending together; but you’ve also noticed that things have been really speeding up as of late.
You’ve noticed that your relationship is really taking things up a notch; and it’s starting to scare you and excite you at the same time. You know that the next level is the two of you eventually locking lips with one another. And the build-up is making you really anxious. You know that a kiss is very meaningful in any kind of relationship; and the moment the two of you lock lips, you’re really going to solidify the mutual adoration that you have for one another. You know that it’s the next step that you’re going to take. It’s only a matter of time. And then finally, when you least expect it, it just happens.
And then it comes again and again. And every time, you anticipate this great and magical experience. But you get something else. You don’t get magic. You don’t get thrill or exhilaration. You don’t feel yourself getting lost in his lips. You don’t feel yourself losing your mind over him. Why is that? You feel so let down after all of the build-up. You feel so disappointed because of how long you’ve been waiting. It was terrible. What do you do? What does that mean? What are you supposed to do at this point? Is there even anything you can do at all? Is this a problem that you can just live with?
Here’s the truth about your situation: there’s really not much time to waste if you want to be able to fix this problem of yours. But you also have to keep in mind that it takes two to tango. If the kiss was bad for you, then it was also just as bad for him. And you also have to take into consideration the possibility that he’s not the problem in this scenario. Maybe you are the one who is the bad kisser here. Maybe you’re the one who has the problem. But don’t freak out just yet. Don’t be so anxious. It’s only a problem if you can’t fix it. And the good news here is that everything has a solution. There is still something that you can do to remedy the situation.
There’s no denying that kissing is absolutely important to any form of physical attraction and intimacy. It’s almost primal. If you don’t know what it takes to be a good kisser, then you’re in for some serious trouble. Sure, he may have been attracted to you at first, but the attraction is slowly going to vanish over time. So, you always need to make it a point to improve your kissing game if you really want to make your relationship work.
The thing about kissing is that anyone can learn to get better at it. So, it doesn’t really matter if you think that you’re terrible at it. You can always improve so as long as you show the willingness to learn. Here are few things you might want to know about kissing so that you can get better at it.
1. Kissing is more emotional than it is physical.
Don’t get lost in all the physical technicalities of it; how much tongue, how little tongue, how you tilt your head, how much you bite… that’s all important. But what’s more important is how you feel and how you let your feelings manifest through a kiss.
2. Always be gentle in the beginning.
You might make the mistake of thinking that you always need to be wild and aggressive when you’re just starting to kiss a man. But a lot of the time, a man is going to want a gentle kiss. He’s going to want that trademark female softness.
3. Learn to really value slowing things down.
Sometimes, fast and aggressive isn’t always the best way to inject passion into a kiss. You can be just as passionate when you learn to slow things down a little bit. Tone down the aggression and really let your emotions manifest themselves through your kiss.
4. Learn how to read and respond.
You can’t be selfish. Again, it takes two to tango. You aren’t the only one who is caught in this kiss. You are engaged in a kiss with someone else. And you can’t be so selfish to only be thinking about yourself. Read how your partner is feeling; and react off of it.