One of the biggest killers in a relationship is being emotionally unavailable.
One of the biggest killers in a relationship is being emotionally unavailable. And there’s no getting around the fact that emotional unavailability is a problem that continues to plague lots of relationships all over the world. Remember that all relationships are built on physical and emotional connections. When either of these are compromised in even the slightest sense, then the entire relationship is compromised as a whole. So how does emotional unavailability come to be and why is it so difficult to tackle? Well, to start, its’ a very difficult problem to identify. It can even be missed by those with the sharpest of senses.
Essentially, emotional unavailability can arise within a person whenever one starts to feel a sense of inadequacy or vulnerability. When these insecurities start to plague a human being, then one starts to question whether they are really deserving of love or not. And when these insecurities start to take control of the psyche, then they can become very difficult to control. They start to consume the entire person’s personality and will compel them to become more closed off and more guarded. They won’t want to open themselves up to their partners anymore out of fear that they won’t like what they see inside once they do decide to let them in. That is how emotional unavailability manifests itself in a relationship. It is brought about by the fear of rejection, indifference, and heartbreak.
And so people who become emotionally unavailable will start to express their love at a distance. And the problem with that is that love can become severely distorted and unrecognizable when it is conducted from an emotional distance. There are just too many disruptors that contaminate and compromise the integrity of an emotionally distant love. There is a sense of aloofness and disengagement whenever love is compromised by emotional distance. The connection between two people will be so much harder to build on if you bring distance into the equation. And that’s why it’s importance for a lot of couples to always make sure that emotional unavailability is addressed early in the relationship.
Remember, the moment that emotional unavailability starts to manifest itself in the relationship, many of the important and most beautiful facets of the relationship start to turn ugly. Once a person’s insecurity starts to cripple the self, then it taints the whole dynamic of interdependency in the relationship. Remember that the most loving couples understand that their relationship is built on a system of balanced give and take. But insecurities can often ruin that balance and tilt the scales heavily towards one side. That kind of imbalance and emotional disruption can be very bad for romantic relationships. Emotional interdependency means that you should both be able to open up to one another about anything at all. But one when side starts becoming closed off, it can lead the other side to start feeling neglected and deeply undervalued.
So the moment you spot signs of emotional vulnerability in your relationship, you have to make an effort to correct that flaw. You need to make sure that you put in the work to ensure that you don’t become too distant or closed off from your partner. You need to be able to reopen those lines of communication and emotional connection. Just follow the tips that are going to be listed on here to give you an idea on how to fix these problems in your relationship.
1. Reassess all of your beliefs and expectations surrounding yourself and the relationship.
Take a look at your relationship and try to see how you add to the relationship. Try to figure out how much value you add to your love. Also take a look at the expectations that you set for yourself as a lover.
2. Make sure that all of your beliefs and expectations align with your partner’s.
Sometimes, a lot of emotional unavailability can stem from withholding expectations from one another. Open up about your expectations and make sure that they mesh well together.
3. Leave no secrets untold.
No more secrets. Stop being secretive about everything. Don’t withhold anything from your partner that is worth mentioning. Always be willing to come clean with the truth no matter how inconvenient or uncomfortable it might make you. It’s only going to make you stronger.
4. Make it a point to devote time exclusively for the relationship.
Time is important and undervalued a lot. Make sure that you always make it a point to spend time with one another; quality time without any distractions or disruptions.
5. Own up to your feelings and your emotions.
Be accountable for how you feel. Own up to them. Don’t try to hide them or keep them inside. Come clean about them and be confident that your partner is going to understand you because that’s what love is all about after all. Acceptance.
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