7 things to DO on a first date
The first date happens to be something that gets everyone worked up about, and rightfully so at that. Even though you’ve already made your first impression leading to the date itself; but a glimpse of the relationship ahead is found somewhere in that date. You should acknowledge that the pressure is mutual. If you’re the one asking someone out, you want everything to go as smoothly as possible as you don’t want them to have anything short of perfect. On the other hand if you’re the one being asked out, you want to make sure that they don’t regret it.
We all have our own ways to deal with such pressures, but here a few things which may help ease things for both of you, and possibly result in the date you both want;
Plan the date
Decide what you want to do on the date and make sure it is something that you both would enjoy. This is easier when you know the concerned person to some extent; but in some cases that may not be so. Even then, there is no need to panic, all you need to do is ask. If they are reluctant in telling you what they would like to do, provide them with options, and that would be settled. But don’t take their reluctance to be a sign of disinterest; they probably don’t want to end up making you do something that you might not like.
Choose the venues wisely
Having decided on what to do is not enough; the kind of place you’re going to is equally important. For instance, if you’ve made dinner plans, decided on the cuisine; choose a nice place, and if you have a favorite spot, make sure to reserve it. Choose places that are not too crowded or too deserted. Crowded places will distract you and deserted places will make you uncomfortable, as you would be too aware of the first date situation. Go to a place that is accessible to both of you. At times if something unexpected happens, or the place just does not feel right, you can always leave and go somewhere else. Improvise and take control of the situation and you’d do just fine.
You cannot let this one go wrong at any cost. Look your best. Your date is going to do the same, and they would not expect anything less of you and it is actually very reassuring. Everything you do should show how much this date means to you, including the way that you look. It should be evident that you’ve put in considerable time and effort to get ready for the date. If you slack out, the next person will be thinking all sorts of things and doubting your interest in them from the moment they see you. For them the date would have been ruined even before it has begun.
Keep the conversation going
First dates can be tricky in terms of conversation. Even if you’re the kind of person who hits it off with everyone they meet, the stakes of the date might change that. Many a times, people make small talk, but they hesitate in initiating an actual conversation. A good thing to do would be to talk about yourself; not too much of course, you don’t want them to think of you as a narcissist. This actually helps the next person to relax and maybe share relatable things about themselves. Make sure to ask something every now and then in order to engage them in the conversation, without turning it into an interrogation. Keep the conversations light, funny and intriguing.
Never pretend to be someone you’re not just for the sake of impressing someone. It almost always ends in disaster since as time passes; you fail to keep up with the proposed image. You never know what might set off an alarm. You might intimidate them by all your efforts to impress them. Just be yourself. Always remember that the more comfortable you are with yourself, the more comfortable you make people to be themselves. Also, this way you have no unrealistic expectations of each other.
Keep the romance on a minimum
Don’t go overboard when it comes to romance, after all, it’s a first date, you’re not asking them to marry you. Even the most helpless of romantics don’t appreciate too much romance on such occasions. It would only make the next person uncomfortable and awkward which is something you definitely don’t want.
If there’s going to be a second date, make sure they know
If you’re sure that you want to pursue them, it’s a good idea to casually let them know. Suggest what you would like to do on the next date, this kind of reassures them. In doing so, their response also helps you to judge where they stand. Make sure you don’t say it too soon; you don’t want to scare them away. Judging from how the date is going, either bring it up towards the end of the date, or maybe even later, but don’t leave them hanging forcing them to think that you might be second guessing the whole thing.
These things should ensure a good first date, even if not a perfect one. Even with all these things, there still are a million things that could go wrong, just deal with things as they come and never lose your calm. Take everything very lightly and be yourself. The key is to make everything as comfortable as possible and let the magic happen!