#1: You apologize even though you don’t need to.
1. You give more than you are receiving.
You should always make it a point to minimize all of the imbalances in your relationship. These imbalances can take its shape in the form of finances, emotional support, physical support, or mental stimulation. You always have to make sure that you are getting as much as you are giving into a relationship. Otherwise, the imbalance might breed certain ill feelings and resentment.
2. You keep on accepting excuses and alibis.
Of course, you are going to have to learn how to be patient and understanding in the relationship. You are going to have to be lenient with your partner. You have to understand that you are both only humans who are both prone to flaws. But what you can’t ever tolerate is you allowing yourself to become a pushover. It gets to a point where excuses and apologies just aren’t going to be enough to cut it.
3. You keep hanging on to toxic people in your life.
Toxicity is dangerous and that’s why you should always make it a point to stay away from toxic people as much as possible. If you have a toxic partner, then you risk opening yourself up to that toxicity. Your toxic partner might end up corrupting your soul and your relationship as a whole. To add to that, if you have any toxic friends, they will find a way to contaminate your relationship with their toxicity as well and so it would be better for you to just drop them.
4. You still engage in high school-style gossip.
Gossip always breeds a bad environment. It encourages a culture of fakeness and cowardice. If you have a problem with a person, and that problem directly affects you, then you have to be willing to address that person face-to-face. But if your problem with another person is just none of your business, then it would be best to stay out of it entirely. You never want your relationship to be the subject of other peoples’ gossips even though it’s none of their business.
5. You value your partner more than you do yourself.
At some point, you have to allow yourself to be a little selfish. You can’t just always be deprioritizing yourself for the sake of your partner or your relationship. While selflessness can be admirable for the most part, it can also be potentially destructive. Remember that the most important person in your life is you and you should never willingly overlook yourself for the sake of others. Know your worth, and people will respect you more for doing so.
6. You put in too much effort in impressing people who don’t respect you.
Sometimes, you just really have to learn how to pick your spots. If your partner or anyone else doesn’t give you the respect that you deserve, you have to learn to demand for it or walk away. You have to develop the courage that you need to earn their respect. Stop trying to put in the effort if they won’t end up caring about what you do.
7. You apologize even though you don’t need to.
You never want to end up being a pushover in the relationship. So whenever you screw up, own up to it. Make the necessary apologies. Learn from your mistakes, and you move on. But if your partner wants you to apologize even though there’s no reason for you to do so, you shouldn’t. You can’t allow yourself to be owned by another person. You should never have to apologize just because another person is expecting you to. You have to be able to stand your ground whenever necessary.
8. You force yourself to go out even when you don’t want to.
You don’t have to go out with your partner every single time they want you to. If you’re not in the mood, if you’re busy, or if you’re feeling sick, you don’t have to feel compelled to go out. If you want to stay in and spend your time at home, then you should be able to do so without any negative repercussions. You should make your partner understand that you also have a choice in the matter and that you won’t give in to any demands just because.
9. You keep judging your life by comparing yourself to others.
It would be foolish for you to assess the state of your life by comparing your life to those of others. You can’t always be choosing to view your own life through the lenses of others. You have to remember that your life is unique and that only you are familiar with all of your hardships and your struggles. You are the only one who knows what it’s really like to be in your shoes and so it’s pointless to compare. It’s the same with relationships. You can’t judge the state of your relationship by comparing it to other romances. You have a unique love story that is entirely your own and no one can take that away from you.
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