Have you been cheated on?
It can be incredibly upsetting to learn when someone engages in third-party affairs. There is just a level of dishonesty, mistrust, and betrayal there that is downright disgusting to a morally upright human being. Even if you just find out that a close friend of yours gets cheated on (or cheats on the person they’re with), you would absolutely flip your head despite the fact that the cheating doesn’t affect you directly. You would still be totally disgusted with the idea of being associated with someone who cheats. Cheating sucks and it would be a disservice to everyone to merely simplify it. Unfaithfulness and infidelity is always going to be a complex issue. It’s never going to be just black and white. But regardless of the motivations and nuances that come with a situation of cheating, you still know that there’s still something inherently wrong with that picture.
You have always been taught that people are imperfect and are prone to making mistakes. You are always made to believe that you have to be patient with people, and you always have to leave them room for growth and development after a setback. But what happens when someone you love and trust very deeply cheats on you? Is that a mistake that you can merely overlook, forgive, and move on from? Or is it such a grave sin that you could never find yourself to trust this person ever again?
One factor that sets cheating apart from other relationship sins is the fact that there is a promise and a trust that is being broken. It’s practically a given at this point that if you are in a committed monogamous relationship with someone, then you have no business channeling any of your romantic energy unto someone else. But we live in an imperfect world where things are less than ideal. Promises are broken all the time. And we have to choose whether we can forgive these breaches of trust or not. We have to be the ones who decide how we move on from this emotionally compromising situations.
It can be difficult to find your way back to a haven of trust with a person who deliberately betrayed you, but it’s not entirely impossible. Granted, they say that trust is like a piece of glass. Once it is broken, it can never really be put back together in the same way ever again. But that of course doesn’t mean that the trust can’t be salvaged in some shape or form.
According to exhaustive studies and analyses by relationship experts, there is a way to rebuild trust in a relationship after an incident of cheating. They conclude that it’s never going to be an easy process and the odds are definitely stacked against the participants. But typically speaking, it all depends on one’s approach to the situation. Everyone is going to approach this scenario differently because we all have our individual personalities that drive our actions and our motivations. But according to these experts, there are 3 very important pieces of advice that you need to keep in mind if you are trying to learn how to trust someone who has cheated on you in the past.
1. The less you know about the situation, the easier it will be for you.
It’s enough that you know that you’ve been cheated on. You don’t need to know any more than that especially if you want to learn to trust this person again. In this case, ignorance is indeed bliss. It will be so much more difficult for you to trust your partner once more if you can’t shake the vivid image of them cheating on you from your mind. There are some aspects of this scenario which are best left untouched especially if you want peace of mind.
2. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help from a real expert or therapist.
They are called professionals for a reason. Sometimes, no matter how much you want to, it’s going to be difficult for you to navigate your way back to a place of ease and comfort with a person who deliberately betrayed you. Sometimes, you’re just going to need that extra help from a professional and there’s really no shame in asking for it. It just shows that you are humble enough to acknowledge that you are human and you have your emotional limitations.
3. Let time do its healing wonders.
And lastly, let time do its work on you. It’s been said that time is the world’s greatest healer and that’s true. Eventually, time heals all wounds. It may take you a few weeks, months, or maybe even years, but you’ll get there. Just be patient and trust that eventually, you’re going to find yourself emotionally ready to place your trust in your partner again.
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