Friendships are important for everyone – we all have at least one best friend who we can confide in and who’s always there for us. But when you’re married, you need to create a healthy atmosphere at home and take care of your partner first – and your friends should be supportive enough to understand. Such is not the case with today’s story, where a friend got upset.
The Story
Redditor, throwaway66600000, shared his story on AITA (Am I the A**hole?) to ask the community whether he did the wrong thing for kicking out his friend because his wife was tired and needed to rest. He wrote:
“Throw away account. So, I 28M have a wife 27F who works full time as a CNA while she is in school to become a an autopsy technician. She works a LOT. She is constantly picking up extra shifts working doubles and even triples. She does all that on top of going to school full time. Because of that she often takes a nap after work.”
“Well yesterday, I had a friend over who I will call E. My wife and E do not get along as E makes her uncomfortable but she and I don’t prevent one and other from seeing friends just because one of us doesn’t like the others friend. E was over at mine and my wife’s house playing video games when my wife calls to tell me she’s on her way home from work. She sounds exhausted and I asked her if she felt ok to drive and if not I’d come pick her up from work and go back together the car later.”
“She says she’s fine to drive and that she’ll see me later. I said ok and told her I loved her. E and I go back to playing video games. It is worth mentioning that the only tv my wife and I have is in our bedroom. I was laying on the bed playing And E was sitting in my desk chair. About 15 minutes or so later I hear my wife come in the house and call out to let me know she was home. I come into the living room and give her a kiss.”
“She all but collapses into my arms exhausted to the point she couldn’t even walk to the bedroom. I ask her if she’s ok and she says is yea just a long day at work. I really need a nap. I nodded and told her to come lay down in the bed. When we get to the bedroom I politely tell E that he needed to leave as my wife was exhausted and we could play later that night. E asks why he needs to leave and why my wife can’t just sleep while he and I keep playing. I explained that it was just a game and that my wife and her needs came first. E then asks why my wife couldn’t just take a nap on our living room couch. I told him I wasn’t making her sleep on the sofa just because he wanted to keep playing.”
“E gets pissed and slammed his controller down on the dresser and goes to leave. Before he does, he turns to my wife and tells her I’ll bet your happy he always feels like he has to pick you over anyone else. He leaves and slams the door on the way out. My wife turns to me and starts to apologize saying she could have just slept on the couch. I tell her no she couldn’t have and tell her to get some rest.”
“Later that night my other friends are blowing up my phone saying things along the lines of bros before h*es and saying it was rude to kick e out just so my wife could sleep. All of my married friends however are on my side saying my wife’s needs come first before my friends. E is now saying he won’t speak to me until I apologize. So am I the a**hole?”
The Responses
You can already guess what Reddit’s community would’ve said about this husband’s story – it’s very simple. All of them supported him for what he did. For context, NTA means “Not the A**hole.” Here are some of the best comments:
fun_brainz said:
“NTA, but you need to get better friends. They sound awful!”
Disastrous_Name161 wrote:
“NTA but why are you still friends with him? Making somebody uncomfortable and not liking someone are two entirely different things. His reaction to you saying your wife comes first tells you everything you need to know about what type of friend he is. (The kind you stop being friends with)”
Panaccolade commented:
“NTA. Why do you want to be friends with someone who is so happy to disrespect your marriage? So E isn’t speaking to you. So what? Is acting entitled to your time, home and console the sign of a good friend? Because I don’t think so. He’d be thrilled if you ruined your marriage by neglecting your wife’s needs. That’s not the sign of a good friend either. Of course your wife is never going to say “don’t be friends with that person” but I think you should take a step back and ask yourself what you believe constitutes a good friend. There’s every chance you may find E just doesn’t meet those expectations.”
There are over 2400 comments and answers on this post, you can read them on Reddit here.
Our Take
NTA. A husband needs to take care of his wife, simple. And if someone’s your friend, they should also know the importance of your wife in your life – this husband’s friend is highly disrespectful.
What’s Your Take?
What’s your take on this husband’s situation? Talk to us in the comments below.
Source: Reddit
Clearly we know who is mature here. He did the right thing. Family first. When babies come, you need to do the same thing. I applaud you for treating your wife respectfully. She’s working very hard right now and you’re taking loving care of her. The friends that don’t get it, at your age, really do need to grow up.
Your wife clearly loves you, and is respectful enough to not ask you to choose between her and your friend. But he seems to be the opposite for your friend, maybe it’s time for him to have a break and get some prospective? The one question I would like to ask is, does your friend have/had a partner?
He is no friend whatsoever. Get rid. What an AH!
I think he was right to tell his mate to go, the mate is just selfish, rude and obnoxious. I think he better re-think who his mates are, because it certainly isn’t him.