We’ve shared plenty of stories about in-laws and we wish we had positive ones to share. Sadly, the negative stories take over a majority of in-laws’ stories even though there are a lot of good folks out there who want the best for their children’s marriage. Today’s story, too, is a negative one.
The Story
Redditor and wife, Xoxo76757, shared her story on AITA (Am I the A**hole?) for rejecting her mother-in-law’s strange requests of sleeping in her bedroom and locking the door. She wrote:
“Context: my husband (m34) and I (f26) got married 9 months ago, we live in a different town from his parents, and his mom visited us unexpectedly on Friday.”
“Now to give some context about my MIL, She is okay-ish but has no respect for her son’s privacy and by extension, mine.”
“When it was time to go to bed, MIL requested that we let her sleep in the bedroom, on the master bed, not just that but lock the door as well because she explained she can’t feel comfortable enough to sleep without locking the door. I found this bizzare but I politely declined and suggeted other options like the guest room, couch and air mattress but no she turned around and presented these options to me. My husband agreed but I said no. This initiated an argument between her and I. During the argument I pointed put how I didn’t want to be keot out of my room and away from my stuff but she lashed out at my husband saying “Don’t you just stand there! Say something!”. My husband told me to let her it’s just one night, but I told her those were all the options I had for her and if she didn’t like them then I could book her in a hotel. She took it as in I was kicking her out and started crying which made my husband upset.”
“She left at 12am and my husband blew up saying I disrespected his mom who was a GUEST at our house and treated her poorly, he then reminded me it’s our bedroom not just mine and I acted horribly to her causing her to go stay at a hotel in the middle of the night. He went to book a room in the same hotel as her and turned his phone off. The next day she went home and told the family who berated me calling my behavior towards MIL abhorrent and loathsome, now my husband is complaining about how I keep trying to ruin his relationship with his family and push them away.”
“But I want to know if I was really ta?”
The Responses
Reddit’s community unanimously supported this wife for what she did. For context, NTA means “Not the A*hole.” Here are some of the top comments:
byuell wrote:
“NTA”
“Girl I would get a divorce asap, these kind of relationships never last for a long time. He is not able to see the disrespect his mother is giving BOTH of you guys. Run”
Accomplished-Shop514 commented:
“NTA. It’s creepy that she wants to sleep in the room you and your husband (her son) share. Especially with that insane amount of pushback she was giving and looking at her son to ‘step in’ only makes this worse than it needs to be. Husband is acting like a mommas boy and needs to see his mom is totally in the wrong”
Environmental_Lab107 said:
“NTA but I find it bizarre that your husband went to the hotel too. Did he sleep with his mommy?”
“So freaking weird. Neither my in-laws or parents would ask for my room. I’d tell them no. I wouldn’t want her locked in my room going through my things. Weird”
Icy_Climate_5755 chimed in:
“NTA. That’s weird. Especially when there is a perfectly good guest bedroom. She is trying to assert her authority as the main woman in your husbands life. If he doesn’t stick up for you when she is trying to kick you out of your marital bed that’s a big red flag.”
Individual-Mall-6914 wrote:
“NTA, you are married now. Your husband is the AH. He needs to set the boundaries with MIL, and respect yours. This happened to me as well. My parents would tell me I needed to come over and help with something, not respecting plans I had with my wife. It was how I lived when I was single. My parents struggled, but they got over it. They now know to let us know well in advance, and that I am no longer at their disposal on a whim. In as much as your husband thinks you disrespected your MIL, he actually disrespected you. This needed to happen. He needs to choose you every time.”
Catatomical spoke facts:
“NTA – This is YOUR personal space, you may share it with your husband but it should not go further than that, and that your husband pulled the ‘it’s my room too’ with regard to this is just wrong. She had a spare room that she could stay in FFS. This was definitely some kind of weird power play…”
“You should probably be thinking hard about whether you want this to be the rest of your life, because your husband has his balls stuck in his mother’s handbag and he’s putting her first. That he’s blaming you and they also have their family berating you too is unacceptable.”
“Good luck, you are going to need it!”
rosechells said:
“NTA: if she has no problem boundary stomping, and your husband has no spine, it’s only going to get significantly worse when you have children. The fact that everyone is blowing up you is alarming. Just a few red flags”
This post has over 4k comments at the time of writing this article, you can read them on Reddit here.
Share Your Take
What are your thoughts on this wife’s story? Share your take in the comments below.
Source: Reddit