What We Learn After Being Cheated On

Being cheated-on is one of the worst experiences of life. It is hard to recover from a broken relationship. And it is much more worse when the reason for breakup was your ‘cheating partner’.В It is very painful to find out that your partnerВ has been betraying you. The person whom you considered to be your soul mate, your significant other and your life partner was unfaithfulВ to you during all this time.

Infidelity from your partner can push you into a series of emotional and psychological strains. Partners who get cheated-on undergo a number of traumatic feelings.В They experience:

  • Insecurity
  • Worthlessness
  • Loss of Trust
  • Anger
  • Rejection
  • Inadequacy
  • Shame
  • Hurt

The partner who gets cheated-on has to undergo all these awful emotions. Life seems to be ending at the start of a breakup. But later, we decide to drag ourselves out of this phase of continuous pain. Eventually, we all overcome (maybe to some extent) our breakups and the cheated-on experience. There is no other choice, we learnВ to survive and we learn to heal our souls.

During this phase of rescuing ourselves and winding up, we undergo a thoughtful process. We review all the incidents of our past life and we drive towards different conclusions. The whole experience of being cheated-on by our partners makes us learn aВ lot about life. ThisВ dreadfulВ experience transforms us into a totally new being. We learn a lot from our experienceВ and this gives us a new approach towards life. We learn:

7. Trust Is The Most Important Thing In A Relationship

After being betrayed, we learn that trust is the most important ingredient for a healthy and successful relationship. Without trust, no relationship can survive. We used to have completeВ faith and confidence in our relationship withВ our significant other. Once they broke our trust, they also break our hope and faith in relationships.

But after sometime, we try to overcome this phase of disappointment and now we are transformed into a person who has learnt his/her lesson. We startВ to trust otherВ peopleВ again, but this time we will trust only those who are worthy of it.

6. It Isn’t About Me

After a lot of self-pity and self blaming, we finally realize that it was never about us. The fact that our partner was unfaithful with us had nothing to do with our physical appearance or emotional integrity. The ‘cheating partner’В is the person to be blamed for all this. If he/she has decided to break the vow of livingВ in a committed relationship, then it is totally their fault.

In most cases, the victim partner starts blaming themselves for being the sole reason for failure of their relationship. However, later on in life, we learn that we are not to be blamed as we are pretty successful in our relationships with others. We then understand that we are quite capable of maintaining normal, healthy and successful relationships. So, finally we overcome the feeling of guilt within ourselves.

5. Love Isn’t Always Enough

An important lesson of life is learned the hard way. Love is very powerful, but it takes more than just love to make a relationship successful.

We learn the fact that you cannot make strong foundations of a relationship on just love. Dedication, commitment, honesty, compromises and a whole lot of conscious efforts are required, to make a relationship last forever.

4. Forgive And Forget

Even if we think that our ‘cheating partner’ doesn’t deserve it, we forgive them. We learn that this forgiveness is not for them, it is for our own peace. We learn to forgive those who cheated on us and we try to forget that part of our lives.В AfterВ the bitter experience ofВ betrayal, we learn that holding on to that hatred and anger will only destroy us further. In order to move on, we have to let go of all the feelings of hatred, anger and resentment attached to that person.

3. WeВ Are More Strong Than WeВ Ever Thought

After being betrayed and left alone to cry for days and weeks/months, youВ ultimately realise one thing, you are more strong than you ever thought you’d be. Although, being cheated on is a dreadful experience and we went through agonising heart aches, but at the end we learn that we are survivors.

Many a times we tell this to ourselves – ‘if IВ can survive this heartbreak, I can survive any trauma in my life’. This is very much true, to a major extent. Our past experiences make us more strong and they help us realise our potential strengths that weВ were not aware of earlier.

2. To Trust Our Intuition

After being betrayed, we learn the fact that we must always stick to the cliche’ ”follow your instincts”. When we were in the relationship with our ‘cheating partner’, we always got negative vibes. Our sixth sense warned us that something fishy is going on that is affecting our relationship. It is possible that we have ignored our intuitions earlier while we were in the relationship. But after being cheated-on by our partners, we learn to always follow our instincts.

1. Move On – Towards Peace And Happiness

We have to make peace with our past for a better future life. There is no point in living in the agony of your past. We learn this after bitter experience of betrayal. Quite some time after our breakup, we finally realise that we have to move on to embrace peace and happiness. This lesson is hard to learn but once we learn it, we evolve asВ a totally new person.

Talk To Us:

  • What have you learnt fromВ being cheated-on?
  • Share your survival story with us and tell us about your experiences after being betrayed by your partner.В 
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