It’s actually not all that difficult to find yourself in a relationship that just doesn’t do it for you. It’s the kind of relationship that doesn’t give you any meaning or fulfilment. You’re essentially in a relationship with someone who isn’t treating you the way that you’ve always wanted to be treated.
But you also have to realize that you only ever really get what you’re willing to ask for and what you’re willing to tolerate. Once you exercise your right to demand for more, then you actually start to take better control of your situation.
You have to realize that just because you’re in a relationship with someone who happens to be at your side all the time doesn’t mean that they’re actually going to be worth being with. There are so many people who make the mistake of falling into relationships with guys who give them the least bit of attention; just because they are so desperate to escape living life as a single person.
Okay, he expressed a genuine romantic interest in you, so you’re sure that the intentions are there. But good intentions alone are never really enough to bring meaning and fulfilment to a relationship. You can’t have good intentions be the only factor that you take into consideration when deliberating the risk of falling in love with someone.
You have to be able to demand more from someone you’re in a relationship with. You need to be able to refrain from settling for anything that you feel is genuinely beneath you. You need to stop settling for mediocre romances and bland relationships.
First of all, you have to keep in mind that you don’t NEED to be in a relationship with anyone. You don’t NEED to be in love to feel like you can be a person of worth in this world. You don’t NEED to be in a relationship with anyone for you to be happy.
You don’t NEED anyone to take care of you because you are perfectly capable of doing that for yourself. You have the capacity to survive this life without being in a romantic relationship with someone. You can make your way through this world on your own.
But if it just so happens that you meet someone who happens to add value to your life; and you feel like this person is someone who is really worth devoting a bulk of your time and effort to, then by all means, go ahead and fall in love. But you still have to remember that falling in love is a choice that you make every single day that you’re alive.
You don’t fall in love out of necessity – because if you do, you’re not really in love. You’re just becoming unhealthily attached to someone. And that is always a recipe for emotional disaster. Think of having a partner in life as a very welcome bonus; but not really an absolute necessity.
You should always strive to attain the best in life – whether in your career or relationships. So you should never be settling for anyone who doesn’t deserve to be with you. You have to stop trying to convince yourself that you are only worthy of average men who are ready to give you an average love in an average relationship that makes you feel like an average person.
Love is many things but there is one thing that it definitely isn’t – average. So if you feel like you’re stuck in an average love, then it’s not love at all. And you’re just lying to yourself at that point.
So be patient. Don’t be so desperate to jump into the sack with the next guy you see just because you couldn’t wait for the love that was really meant for you. If you’re feeling a little impatient or desperate, then just keep in mind that you are actually cheating yourself if you want to rush the process. At the end of the day, the goal isn’t to be in a relationship just to make yourself whole.
You are already whole as you are. You are the only one who can give yourself a sense of completion; the sense of fulfilment that you’ve been seeking for. And if you look for that completion in other people, you’re just never going to find it. No single person in this world is going to complete you. No relationship in this world is going to be the sole reason for your fulfilment as a human being.
You are more than enough to bring those things into your own life – regardless if you’re in a relationship or not. You fall in love with someone who complements you. You don’t fall in love with someone who completes you. You are already as complete as can be. And that’s all a result of the love that you give yourself. So start with that. Fall in love with yourself. And watch as other people will line up to do the same.
