Skip to content
Life

10 Things You Shouldn’t Hold Against Your Boyfriend

Sofia Hester Sofia Hester | December 20, 2016 | 6 min read

"As long as you don’t feel suffocated, a little jealousy and insecurity is normal."

Let’s face it guys, no two humans are the same and same is the case with your boyfriend. He does not act the same way as you do and because of the differences, it can be hard to avoid arguments and resentments. Moreover, every relationship requires some sort of adjustments and compromises. On top of that, men are very dissimilar to women which is why we’ve hunt down a few things that you should never hold against your man: 13 changes after marrying your boyfriend can help you both navigate the complexities of your union. You may find that some of these adjustments lead to a deeper understanding of each other’s needs and expectations. Embracing these changes can ultimately strengthen your bond and enhance your relationship.

  1. Forgetfulness

Men, generally, are forgetful creatures. Yes, they do forget things sometimes but you have to understand that a man has a lot of responsibilities and a lot of things on his plate. They do feel bad about forgetting things and most of them even apologize or make up for it later. It is never okay to hold a long time grudge for their forgetfulness because that’s something built-in, in the male psyche and you do not need to take it personally. In addition to forgetfulness, there are often toxic behaviors in relationships that can create tension and misunderstandings. Recognizing these patterns is crucial for fostering a healthier dynamic. Effective communication and empathy can help address these issues and ultimately strengthen the bond between partners.

  1. Jealousy

Every man gets a little jealous and insecure every now and then. This fact can be attributed to their naturally protective and possessive nature. A little jealousy does not mean that he is trying to control you or trying to snatch your freedom, what it does mean, is that he is acting on his nature. Why would you hold it against him if he is a bit scared of losing you? When it comes to relationships, men may also face their own set of insecurities, especially when confronting challenges of dating shorter partners. The dynamics can shift in unexpected ways, leading to doubts about physical compatibility and societal perceptions. It’s essential to communicate openly about these feelings to foster understanding and intimacy.

As long as you don’t feel suffocated, a little jealousy and insecurity is normal.

  1. Space

Men, sometimes, get exhausted from all the daily life stress and that is why, they need some time to return to their normal selves and most men do it by being alone for a while. So the next time he asks for a little alone time, do not hold that against him, he is not sick of you and it is not about you at all. However, if he wants to be alone for more than 48 hours, then your anger is understandable.В 


  1. Expressiveness

Men are naturally less expressive than women, but sooner or later they do share their feelings. It is never okay to hold this fact against him and it is worse to force him to share the things that bother him. With time, he will tell you everything himself. However, there may be signs he’s losing interest in you, such as reduced communication or a noticeable lack of enthusiasm during your interactions. Pay attention to how he responds when you suggest spending time together; if he often seems disengaged or avoids making plans, it could indicate that he’s not as invested as he once was. It’s important to trust your instincts and recognize when the relationship dynamics begin to shift.

  1. Support

Most men do not really understand the mechanics of comforting a woman. If your guy is like most men, there isn’t really you can do except cherish his companionship. If you are going through something and he is with you, then that means that is the best he can do. At least he is there to provide a literal shoulder to cry upon if not emotional support.

  1. Anger

Aggression is something that have been a part of man’s nature since the caveman times. It is merely an evolutionary trait and you should not hold that against him. Every man gets angry to a normal extent and the things he says during that aggressive phase, he rarely means them. So if your guy says hurtful things but to a limit then you should not hold it against him. moreover, even the tiniest amount of physical aggression should not be tolerated. Other than these things, aggression is normal for men.

  1. Work

Men are hardworking and if your man is really committed to you, he will work even harder to provide you with the things that you need even if you are completely independent. He’ll also work hard for his future with him. So, if he works too hard, you need to support him instead of holding it against them. At the end of the day, he is doing this for you.В 


  1. His exes

Every man has that one Ex in his life who pops up every now and then. You do not need to feel insecure about it and you don’t need to hold it against him. If anything, it shows that your guy is very hard to get over. If anything, you should feel proud being with a guy who is desirable by all. In such situations, focusing on building emotional intimacy in relationships can significantly strengthen your connection. It’s important to create an environment where both partners feel safe to share their feelings and vulnerabilities. By doing so, you will not only deepen your bond but also cultivate a sense of trust that can withstand any external distractions.

  1. Family

It’s hard for him to be completely comfortable around your friends and family. But with time, he will be pertly comfortable being around them. Instead of holding it against him, just be patient and give him time. He will be okay in his own time. Moreover, if he does not introduce you to his friend and family right away, do not take it personally. He is just trying to make sure if you two are in a serious commitment. A mentioned earlier, men do things in their own time.

  1. Interests

Being a male, of course his likes are somewhat different from yours. He might not be interested in watching a romantic comedy with you just like you are not interested in going baseball with him and his buddies. Instead of holding it against him, cherish the dissimilarities. After all, similarities are boring. This way, both of you have your ways to blow off steam when you need to.

Talk to me

Men, can you agree with this? Let me know in the comments below!


Leave a Comment
Join the conversation — your thoughts matter

Sofia Hester
Written by
Sofia Hester

Sofia is a love and psychology writer born in Bogotá and based in Miami. She covers emotional intelligence, attachment styles, and the science behind why we fall in and out of love. Passionate and deeply curious, Sofia has a gift for making complex psychology feel personal and relatable. Her writing has resonated with millions of readers across Latin America and the US. She is also a yoga instructor, an enthusiastic salsa dancer, and a devoted cat mum.