4 differences between real love and attachment
What’s the difference?
Only if someone could tell you if it is love or infatuation. At times, we forget to observe the small little signs in our relationships that could help us find true love and avoid another heart break. I would say, when it’s true love you truly feel different. It’s nothing like any relationship you’ve ever been in. But when you are really infatuated with someone, your mind does get clouded. You are constantly fighting with your own self. You often want the person you are infatuated to, to be the love of your life.
Don’t worry, we all want that but many a times we end up making huge mistakes by giving too much love to someone who was just infatuated to us or vice versa. So here are a few things that will help you think through.
4. LEVEL OF TRUST ON THE EFFORTS THEY PUT IN
I realised this when I fell in love. With my previous relationships, I was always evaluating how much I did for them and how much they did for me. It left me and my exes in a doubtful position. They would always second guess my efforts and I would second guess theirs because that’s what you start to do when you don’t truly love someone. Love is utter trust and belief that your partner loves you and that even if it’s less but whatever they do is enough for you.
When you are attached to someone, not replying to your text would bug you. Yet, in love, you would not carry any insecurities regarding the time you give them and the time they give you.
3. YOU CHERISH YOUR PARTNER’S QUALITIES AND FLAWS!
When you fall in love, you fall in love with the person. You fall in love with their crudeness. You fall in love with the flaws that seem perfect to you. You cherish your partner the way they are. Changing them would be the last thing you would think of. Yet, being just attached to someone, you are in love with the idea of a perfect person in your head and somehow you will try your partner to change and mold into that.
Know that, that’s not love. Love is embracing the darkness as well.
2. WHEN YOU START THINKING OF YOUR PARTNER FIRST
Trust me, this will happen. It will be the most liberating feeling, when someone else’s happiness and life starts to mean more to you than your own. Even in the smallest of things you will start thinking of your partner first. When that starts to happen, know that it’s love. Remember, love will always make you a better person. Love will bring humility in you, a sense of selflessness because you care so much more about another soul. Everything from the day you fell in love will be about you two. It will never be about either one of you only.
1. WHEN IT’S LOVE, YOU’LL LOVE YOURSELF TOO
True love is the sense of security It is the feeling of belonging, belonging to someone and someone belonging to you. True love is like the sunny day after a cold night. Things seem perfect, you, feel perfect.
When you are loved by someone truly treasured by them, you will start to love yourself more.
You will feel stronger, emotionally. A sense of protection and security will always surround you because you know in your heart, even if everything in the world goes wrong, there always will be one constant in your life. That’s your partner and that is true love.
It is overwhelmingly satisfying to know that someone would want you exactly the way you are. Not that I am saying, it’s hard to accept people with flaws. We all are flawed in our own ways, we are supposed to be that’s what makes us special. Over a period of time we let these so-called flaws take over our lives and we start to feel insecure. When love comes your way, it’s finally then when you start to embrace your own self as well.
To tell you in the simplest way, when you are in love know that you will be at peace with everything. The way you are, the way they are. The way he treats you, the way you treat them. The way you complete each other.
Talk to me
Have your own story to add to this? Write to me in the comments below. And as always, stay blessed and keep the love alive!