The modern dating world has to deal with an unfortunate epidemic – user-friendliness. It happens. People use other people for reasons and motivations that are purely selfish and harmful. To an extent, we all use one another; but it’s another thing when we use people without thinking about how we are treating them.
We shouldn’t be treating other people like objects. We are all human beings living individual lives and bearing individual struggles. We all have our own crap that we have to deal with. And we have no right to be seeing other people as persons who are beneath us; as mere stepping stones that we can use to get to where we need to be.
But there are so many user-friendly people in the dating market. These are the ones who get into relationships not to find love, but to find out how much they can milk out of the partners that they’re with. And you shouldn’t be s naïve to think that you’re going to be immune to the harmful effects of such people. You could be victimized at this very moment without even knowing it. Here are 9 signs that your girl is just using you.
1. She’s more interested in how much you make than in what you do for a living.
She doesn’t care about what you’re passionate about in life. She doesn’t care about your hobbies and interests. She doesn’t care about what you do for a living. She only cares about how much you make because she wants to know what she can get out of your salary.
2. She is very demanding when it comes to gifts.
She always wants the most lavish and luxurious gifts. She’s always asking you to get her the shiniest things in the store with the most vulgar price tags. Nothing about her is frugal or subtle. She always wants grand items.
3. You feel like you’re carrying most of the load in the relationship.
She isn’t really doing her part in making sure that your relationship is a sustainable one. She doesn’t really put much effort into making your relationship last – and so you have to take it upon yourself to carry the relationship on behalf of the both of you.
4. She is only ever nice to you when she knows she can get something out of it.
There’s always an ulterior motive. There’s always a hidden agenda. There’s always something fishy going on. She’s never really sincere with you. She’s virtually incapable of being nice to you unless she knows that there’s something in it for her. She’s more interested in what you can give her than she is in just actually being nice to you.
5. The people who care about you tell you that she’s bad news.
There are already rumors that go around about her. She has already been talked about by so many people. She has a reputation for using people in relationships; and she’s probably using you now. You’re probably her latest victim.
6. She makes you feel guilty for asking things of her.
Whenever you take it upon yourself to ask her to do more for your relationship, she is really going to make you feel guilty. She’s really going to make it seem like you’re being unreasonable and that you’re asking too much – even though she asks for so much more from you in return.
7. She acts cold whenever you aren’t able to deliver something she wants.
She really throws a hissy fit whenever you don’t deliver on something that she asks of you. She gets really upset like a genuine spoiled brat. She feels like she’s entitled to everything that she asks from you.
8. She doesn’t really spend a lot of time with you.
She doesn’t spend much time with you because you aren’t really all that important to her. She only gives time to the things she values most in life. And she doesn’t really value you much beyond the things that you are able to give her.
9. She never seems to reciprocate the love and affection that you give her.
You try to connect with her, but she never lets you in. She never opens up. She never allows herself to get vulnerable with you. You get the feeling that she’s always maintaining a kind of distance between the two of you. She’s keeping you at bay.
Final Thoughts
If you find out that your lady is just using you for reasons other than love, you have a choice to make. It’s either you allow yourself to act as her puppet or you call her out on it. Hopefully, you choose the latter. You can’t allow yourself to be used and abused in a relationship like that. You must always make it a point to stand up for yourself; to demand for the love that you think you are deserving of from your significant other.
