Butterflies Are Great, But I Want Something Real

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Love isn’t all about pink roses and walks on the beach. Love isn’t always going to be romantic candle-lit dinners and holding hands under the moon. Love isn’t composed purely of unadulterated bliss and happiness. What you see in the movies and on surfaces of your friends’ relationships are only the tips of the iceberg. Underneath all that flash and fervor is the grimy, messy, beautiful, annoying, and authentic face of love. And that’s the kind of love that I’m looking for right now. I have no need for butterflies. I’m looking for the rest of the iceberg.

We’ve all heard the clich of getting butterflies in your stomach whenever you’re around someone who piques your interest. This man manages to always make your heart skip a beat. The butterflies flutter away in your tummy as a result of your extreme infatuation. Your heart stutters and your brain is all in shambles. You find yourself stammering with every word and your hands are all clammy. There’s a warmth all inside of you but you feel terribly cold. You feel your head spinning at the thought of romantic possibility, but you’re smart enough to know that it’s only in your mind.

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Butterflies are there because you’re afraid. The future is uncertain, and you know that uncertainty always brings fear. But you welcome this uncertainty, because it also means maintaining the prospect of love on the horizon. It’s a giddy feeling that you get every time you’re around him. Whenever he throws the least bit of niceties your way, you feel as if you’ve been punched in the guy with a canon unable to respond. These are beautiful feelings and emotions that everybody should get to experience in their everyday life but the sad thing is, these aren’t the real faces of love.

Love isn’t all about pink roses and walks on the beach. Love isn’t always going to be romantic candle-lit dinners and holding hands under the moon. Love isn’t composed purely of unadulterated bliss and happiness. What you see in the movies and on surfaces of your friends’ relationships are only the tips of the iceberg. Underneath all that flash and fervor is the grimy, messy, beautiful, annoying, and authentic face of love. And that’s the kind of love that I’m looking for right now. I have no need for butterflies. I’m looking for the rest of the iceberg.

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It’s fun to stay in that playful stage of skipping heartbeats and fluttering butterflies, but they can lose their appeal overtime. As you get older, you’ll start realizing that real love, the kind that endures, is much harder to find and much more difficult to maintain. This is not an assault on all the butterfly lovers out there. Butterflies are great but they can only keep you interested for so long. Butterflies, as is in their nature, will fly away and you’ll be left disoriented with trying to deal with nothing but the remnants of happiness. It’s during these stages of having no butterflies where you really find out more about what your relationship is really made of; what your love is really made of. – Continue reading on the next page


I want the real and honest face of true love in my life. I want the difficulties of having to deal with disagreements and blunt honesty. I crave for the struggles of being able to manage the time I have for myself and the time I share with my partner. I’m searching for the opportunity to be able to make compromises about my life for the sake of living a better one with another person. With butterflies, you never have to make compromises, you never have to deal with honesty or disagreement, and you never have to share your time. There are no struggles when it comes to butterflies, but I want the struggle.

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Butterflies are beautiful but they’re not the entire truth. They only show you the most beautiful aspects of life, but not the mostВ realВ parts of it. Love isn’t always going to be as pretty as a bee. Love isn’t always going to be easy nor is it always going to be a sure thing. Love is difficult. Love can be ugly. Love isn’t always going to be a sure thing. Like butterflies, true love has the potential to be beautiful if you give it time and space to grow from its caterpillar stages. Like butterflies, true love can be easy, if you learn how to deal with your difficulties with proper demeanor. And lastly, just like butterflies real love can flutter away if you don’t make an effort to keep it in place.

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Butterflies are pretty; like the beauty and innocence of a little child. And maybe that’s what they’re made for. Maybe butterflies are only meant for children in the infant stages of romance. Maybe butterflies are made only for fun and games. Perhaps butterflies are brought in to bring color into our lives and distract us from the grey-scales. But that’s not really what I’m looking for anymore. I’m past that stage of my life. I’m done with playing games, and my perceptions of fun have changed with my age.

My idea of fun these days is stability, consistency, and honesty. Colors are great distractions, but I’ll willingly take the boring grey-scales to go along with my life. I don’t need constant excitement anymore. I’m not looking to be in a perennial state of amazement. I just need steadiness. Like the steady wing of a fluttering butterfly.

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