I am starting to discover that I can’t really blame these people for choosing to be selfish and self-obsessed.
I am starting to discover that perhaps the only person I can really count on is the person who stares back at me in my reflection. And I’ve come to meet that discovery with contentment and purpose. I’m not scared or intimidated by this realization. I am going to choose to embrace it because that’s the best thing I can do for myself at the moment.
I am starting to discover that I don’t have to feel guilty about being selfish and prioritizing myself every once in a while; that I don’t have to feel guilty about cutting out the people in my life who are just bringing me down and holding me back. I am starting to discover that I don’t have to feel guilty about letting go of bad relationships that just don’t add value to my life. I am starting to discover that I don’t have to feel guilty about choosing to remove all semblances of negativity from my life because I don’t want anyone or anything raining on my parade. I am a walking ball of sunshine and I only want to shine brighter as I move on with my life and I can’t do that when I surround myself with negative people. I am starting to discover that not only is it okay, but it’s absolutely necessary for me to always care about my personal well-being. I am starting to discover that self-love isn’t something anyone should be ashamed of.
I am starting to discover that I have full control of my life everything that is happening now is a result of all of my past choices, and everything that happens to me in the future will be a result of everything I decide to do now. That is why I don’t have the luxury of depending on other people to bring about a sense of happiness or fulfilment on my behalf. I cannot allow myself to depend on another person to provide for my needs. I cannot depend on another person to give me the sense of pride, confidence, and self-worth that I so desperately need to form for myself. I need to search for a happy life at my own pace in my own time. I need to be the one who provides for myself. I am the one who needs to add value and worth to my own life. No one else could nor should do it for me.
I am starting to discover that I don’t always have to blindly give all of my love to every single person that I meet. I am starting to discover that trust is something that people have to earn from me and no one is really entitled to it. I am starting to discover that it’s okay for me to be withholding at times in an effort to protect myself. Trust is a valuable gift that you give to another person who deserves it. It’s valuable because once it’s broken, it’s never going to be the same. And that’s why it can only ever be given to those who are really worthy of it; those who would have no intentions of breaking it or harming it. Trust is something you give to a person you feel would actually add value to your life.
I am starting to discover that not all people are going to take the high road and that’s okay. A lot of us will settle for taking the easy route over the right one. There are plenty of us who will let pride get in the way of mending relationships. There are those who will choose to just suppress their emotions and feelings in the hopes that they eventually go away. There are those of us who would rather sweep their problems under a rug than tackle them head on. There are some people who are going to relentlessly pursue their own desires regardless of how their actions or words are going to impact the people around them. They will always be thinking about themselves without regard for how other people are affected by them.
I am starting to discover that I can’t really blame these people for choosing to be selfish and self-obsessed. I really can’t blame them for thinking that the world is out to get them and that they always have to be looking over their shoulders. I cannot blame them for adopting a sense of cynicism and skepticism about the world and the people who are in it. I am starting to discover where these people are coming from and why they act the way that they do. I am starting to understand what happened in their lives that made them this way because the same exact things are happening to me as well.
