Have you ever been into a relationship where, being a woman, you think that you are going absolutely at the right pace and it’s all great and romantic until one day you feel like he is pulling away? This happens with almost 90% of women who are in their prime time of dating and looking for the right guy. So here is a situation: a guy asks you out, you say yes and you two have the most amazing time of your lives together on the first and the next few ones. On the 6th date just when you think that this might be it, the guy seems a little distant. So what led to this conclusion of events?
Here is a theory that might help:
According to women, all a guy sees in them is the outer beauty and if any guy stops seeing it, it’s obvious that they don’t find her attractive enough anymore. Well that’s not it. The real reason behind a guy’s repulsion is totally something else. Most of the time, when a woman starts dating a guy and it all goes great for the next couple of days, she starts thinking that this might be turning into something serious. She might start fantasizingВ the guy into her future and although she does not share the feeling with him, it’s still obvious in her actions.
Women need to feel secure and that feeling of security turns into an apparent need of having something permanent in their lives if they really like it. So when a guy starts feeling that the girl he’s dating indirectly wants something from him that he is not yet ready to give, he starts pulling away. In reality, they both have a great time together but their needs change and that change scares most guys. It is hard for guys to commit to a relationship before the 15th date than women because they like to live in the moment and when they realize that she wants to get something out of him, they start becoming a little distant.В – Continue reading on next page
Take it this way: there are two people who are having an amazing time together without any sense of responsibility or duty and they hit off so well together. Suddenly, the girl starts dreaming about the future and starts expecting the guy to figure out the clues and give her some sort of sanctuary that this might become something permanent.
On the other hand, the guy is simply living in the present, enjoying the company of this woman who makes him so happy and has no intention of settling down yet. He finds no reason to take the relationship to a point where it all gets serious and the fun ends and all he would be left with is the responsibility of looking for a new place to live together, collecting enough money to buy that ring and then for the wedding. So when he starts getting these vibes from the girl, it is natural that he wants to get out of the relationship as soon as possible.
This does not mean that he was not serious with the relationship, it just means that guys take a longer time to figure out where they want to take the relationship and if they have found the girl they want to spend their life with. On the other hand, all a woman needs is some sweet gestures from the guy and that’s it. He is the one! There can be some other reason for the guy to pull away but according to the researches and studies it has always come down to the fact that men are afraid to commit to someone too soon. – Continue reading on next page
Women also need to understand that men have a complete different approach to life. They do not just jump into the future and start handling it like pros instead they build it according to a pace that is comfortable for them.
Another reason for this to happen can be that men don’t like to be told what to do. If they want to make a decision, they need a lot of solid ground and facts to help them. It can take months or it can be spontaneous but it is always based on facts rather than fantasies. It’s not like any of the gender is wrong here. It’s just about the perspective. Apparently this new couple is at the same spot in front of the world but in their minds they are completely on different angles of the graph. So what can be done to prevent this from happening?
A simple solution for women is to be patient.
They need to know the meaning of enjoying and living in the moment and stop fussing about something that might happen in the next 5 years. Instead of assuming they need to just go on with the relationship and try to make things work so that the guy actually has reasons to stay and hold on to her.
For men, they just need to communicate more with their partner so that she knows where they actually are and not where they might be. Phrases like I thought you meant that or it seemed like you were giving a hint always puts you in a bad position and that’s where the trust issues begin.